I remember the first year we were married, we received a Christmas card and letter from  you. You included a photo of you and Uncle Fred. I  had never met you, since you lived so far away and you weren’t able to attend our wedding. I was so surprised and so touched to receive that letter. That began our correspondence over the next 11 years. You sent me photo of you when you graduated from university with your Bachelor’s Degree. I mailed you a card that I made myself. I had made a paper doll of you, complete with white curly hair and a grad gown and cap. I thought it was amazing that you went back to school later in life to complete your degree. Way to go! Over the years it was Christmas letters mostly, with some more thrown in for life events. Then came the internet. I remember how thrilled I was to receive that first email from you! We were giddy with excitement that we could send messages and photos to each other so easily. We were living in Etobicoke in our apt at the time when I received the first email from you. I jumped up from the desk in the office to run off and tell Ross the exciting news! Not many seniors that I know are interested in learning how to use a computer - nevermind email and the internet! I thought to myself, “What a neat lady!” When Uncle Fred passed away, my heart went right out to you and I did the only thing I could think of for you from a distance. I knitted you a comfort shawl. While I knitted it, I thought of you wrapped up snuggly in it. It kept me warm as it grew on my needles. As I told you in my letter when I sent it, I taught my niece (who was 3 at the time) how to knit. She actually knitted part way through a row on that shawl. She sat in my lap, tongue sticking out in concentration with those great big wooden 12 mm needles held firmly in her wee hands. I wish I had a picture of her doing that. She said, “This is fun, Auntie Amanda!” I think that was the best part of the shawl, really. Not that I made it for you, but that my niece worked on it too and gave it an extra-special touch. I wish I had sent you those photos. I will miss you, my great-aunt-in-law, my penpal, my friend. I will miss those letters at Christmas in the mail and miss receiving those emails out of the blue. My vision of you now is  you with perfect eyesight, the lungs of a 20 year old, with your arm around Uncle Fred and that big sweet smile on your face. We love you, we miss you.

A sunbeam to warm you,
A moonbeam to charm you,
A sheltering angel, so nothing can harm you.
~Irish Blessing

and my favourite:

"Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there.
I do not sleep

I am a thousand winds that swiftly blow.
I am the diamond glint
on newly fallen snow.
I am the sunlight
on ripened grain.
I am the soft and gentle autumn rain

When you wake from sleep in the early morning hush,
I am the swift, uplifting rush
of quiet birds in circling flight.
I am the soft, starlight at night.

Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there.
I do not sleep."

~ Mary E. Frye ~